Saturday 25 February 2012

Yamaha XJ650


The frost on the road made life very dangerous. The XJ650, normally quite stable, became as treacherous as a trapped snake. The big front wheel kept trying to slip away. Quick reactions on the bars and with my boot stopped the bike manifesting how it felt - an accident looking for somewhere to happen.

I was a prisoner of my own paranoia. I pulled over to the side of the road, propped the bike against a wall and lit a home-rolled. I let the rising sun warm the road and the tang of ganja heat my blood. Half an hour later I deemed the road safe. Things didn't use to be like this in my youth. Me old BSA twin would stately roll through ice bound roads in a way that the Japanese four could only dream of! Progress where are you?

If the handling gene had done a runner, the XJ could at least boast good reliability, especially for a stock bike that'd done 48000 miles before I bought it. These DOHC fours are tough meat despite having a certain quaintness of design. If anything major goes wrong it needs a total engine strip to sort out. The Nips can be thick.

Their stupidity went as far as a chassis that would jar over rough roads. Felt like someone was kicking me in the backside with hobnail boots whilst someone else was trying to break my arms. There was a certain subtlety to old British bikes which had stiff, short travel suspension but cut down on the pain by having a riding position that allowed the human body more easily to absorb bumps. I know, it's a yawn to compare a modern Jap with an ancient Brit, but history is only bunk if you don't learn from it.

There's a certain waste in the way modern bikes are made to appeal to the weekend rider rather than for practical motorcycling. To the Yam's credit, the shaft drive can't be faulted, very practical if a touch inefficient with all the twists and turns in the transmission's path. The rest was pretty horrifying - tyres wore out in less than 7000 miles and the front pads went west in 4500 miles.

The latter wasn't helped by the way I found myself shooting up to corners 20 to 30mph too fast. What's the old fool complaining about now, should put him on a moped...probably right but I found the smoothness of the engine rather distracting and I'd let her wind up to silly speeds without really thinking about it - until it was almost too late!

Well, I've got a different way of looking at things than most people. For instance, I let the local mechanic do the valves (in the hope he'd go easy on the MOT) and the parasitical little twerp tried to charge me twice what he'd originally quoted. When he wouldn't desist I gave him a sharp right hook, threw the correct money at him and roared out of there (without an MOT) before he could pick himself up off the floor.

Two weeks later I found the XJ was running really bad, spitting and burping like a third world refugee on his first square meal for a month. A strange, sweet smell wafted up from the exhaust. My long memory of past pranks and nasty deeds zeroed in on the olfactory stimulant. Some bastard had put sugar in the petrol tank! I knew who it was and my revenge was total (or totally illegal, so I can't go into details, not even in the UMG).

A certain amount of wickedness is necessary to survive both the motorcycle experience and modern life. Wicked use of the throttle and reluctant gearbox resulted in 130mph - impressive even though the speedo was as optimistic as a vicar in a bordello. Comparisons with friends' bike gave a top speed of only 115-120mph, about what you'd expect from a seventy horse, 450lb bike.

Acceleration, at least up to the ton, was very, very impressive. Some poor lost soul in a Porsche 911 had the shock of his life when I burnt him off. I didn't even have to go into the red. Too much throttle could burn tread off the back wheel in a very expensive manner. Clip-ons made wheelies hard work, no great trouble as I didn't like doing them unless there were schoolgirls around to impress. (Those uniforms...shit, I've blown my cover and can expect the dreaded social workers - oh well, you don't think I'm going to sign this treatise, do you?)

The only time the XJ felt a bit like a cart and horse was on one piece of council neglect, more pothole than tarmac. My doctor wasn't amused when I complained about a bad back...what's with these medical people; overpaid hacks with a patronising line of chatter - you're better off going straight to the hospital. As I had no option but to ride down these dead roads, a thicker seat was quickly found and modified to suit the XJ's strong tubular frame.

I was often sorely provoked by the way the cars tried to block my progress in town. Some jerk would actually swing back and forth in his foot of space in the stalled traffic, desperately, frantically trying to block me off. When they succeeded I'd sit there whipping the throttle back and forth, blipping the horn, being totally ignored by the cager who'd slunk down in his seat. I often thought about carrying a tyre iron or sledge-hammer. On reflection, I decided if I was so armed I'd go really berserk.

Commonplace irritants can become blown up out of all proportion by the combination of rain, cold and endless traffic jams. I'm sure it was the stress and wearing a crash helmet that caused me to start going bald. That made me even more angry. Sometimes I'd blow through traffic at a tremendous pace, practising mind over matter, absolutely convinced that spaces were going to open up for me. Funnily enough, they usually did!

The XJ ran from 48000 miles to 74000 miles without any great hassles. Careful study of the engine's bolts convinced me that the motor had never been touched by human hand (save for the valve covers). Impressive. The engine started to go wrong with some rattles from the camchain, which quickly escalated to tapping noises from the head and knocking from the bottom end.

A bit of bodging on the camchain tensioner (an art learnt by anyone who's owned an eighties Honda) got us past the 82000 mile mark when there was a significant fall-off in performance. Essentially, all the engine's bearing were loose! Not so impressive.

However, the chassis was in very good condition and after a few months a crashed XJ650 turned up for £275. There was always the chance that it'd crashed because the engine seized but I flipped a coin and it came up in favour of buying the bike. The only problem I had was that the shaft drives were slightly different but ten minutes work with the grinding wheel allowed the components to mate. The new bike runs better than ever.

There's probably a bit of luck involved in finding a good one but something nice for around £750 is as sensible buy as any UJM. Don't be frightened by non-standard chassis bits, they just make them all the better. I fancy an XS1100 next time around.

K.W.

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1983 was a good year for motorcycles. Seemed like that to me, anyway, as I viewed the five year old, 14000 mile Yamaha XJ650. Thumbed the starter, the engine instantly rumbling into life, exploded out of a rudimentary 4-1, windows threatening to shatter as I whipped the throttle around. The bike tried to waddle sideways as the secondary vibes ran through the chassis. The test ride went well enough. I didn't fall off. For £350 I couldn't be too choosy; I'd seen some on sale for £1350!

The first ride on a new motorcycle is always interesting. The XJ weighed 450lbs, had naff suspension, a dubious transmission and worn out tyres. It also had 70 horses, a wild dose of acceleration at 7000rpm and a pair of disc brakes that had an on/off action redolent of a sledgehammer smashing an egg. The ride was a series of inane grins and near heart attacks. The XJ didn't want to go where I pointed it and I certainly didn't want to go where it needed to veer off to.

After a few miles of wrestling with the bars, I got a grip on the throttle and slowed down to within 20mph above the legal limit. That was more tolerable but I gave thanks that the cloudy sky didn't let loose with a dose of water. I had the feeling that the XJ's bald tyres would let go without warning on wet roads. The first thing to do was buy a new set of Metzelers.

Thus shod, the next week I had the dubious pleasure of riding 350 miles through rain, fog and cold (this was May!). Or trying to, as the motor would cough on to two or three cylinders without warning and then the power flowed in fully, sending the back wheel into a frenzy. This ensured that I was never bored, also that I could not contemplate any overtaking madness.

Back home, I decided that new coils, HT leads and plugs were needed. After a chat with the dealer I bought a set of plugs and went off to the breakers. Bits from a mangled but brand new XJ900 were fitted at a third of the cost of new XJ650 coils and leads. It didn't rain for a month afterwards, but the problem did actually clear up. For a while.

The commuting chores weren't brilliant. The front discs didn't respond to either a lot of tender loving care or much dosh on fluid, pads and hose. The action was still too sudden and violent. There was enough stopping power to shake the forks loose, but it was very difficult to use. Locked wheels on dry roads were mildly amusing, as the squeals made pedestrians jump out of their shoes. Even with a new tyre, in the wet the slides were heart stopping. I had to put a boot down to save myself a couple of times.

The tyres helped the handling in the dry a lot. There was still a bit of vagueness in the steering but there was no fear of the high speed weaves turning terminal. I was quite happy to sit on the heap at 120 to 130mph for as long as my muscles could hold out against the sensible riding position, that was best for 75 to 85mph cruising. The motor put out a lot of secondary vibes in top at these speeds, was smoother at either 70 or 90mph, so whenever on motorways I got my head down and held the latter speed.

This had fuel pouring through the motor at 35mpg, although it was possible to do 50mpg in town or under a tediously mild right hand. Comfort was good for no more than 120 miles because the saddle's foam had long ago flattened out. But, stopping to fuel up and for a quick walk was sufficient to revive my muscles for another highway session. During the second year of ownership I did a 3500 mile tour in a couple of weeks without any problems.

Maintenance mostly consisted of oil, filter and carbs. The eight valves were really a dealer job but could be left for 15000 miles. Pads lasted 7000 miles, tyres 10,000 and 9000 miles front and rear. Finish was much better than I'd expected, only a little bit of paint curling off the frame welds (stock exhausts are naff, though). All the more surprising as I've seen some real rat XJ650s around.

Two years and 32000 miles went by with nothing more than money spent out on consumables. That put 46000 miles on the clock, enough to have the camchain clicking away and the 4-1 just about rusted through. I was being stopped by the rozzers about once a month, but they never bothered booking me. A used 4-1 for £30 was a lot cheaper than having a split-link camchain fitted for £125, as I didn't fancy doing it myself.

I rather wish I had, though, as the motor sounded and felt completely different. There was some backfiring through the carbs, which tried to pop out of their manifolds. I assumed the replacement exhaust was a bit more restrictive and tried to retune the carbs. It was whilst playing around with the airfilters off that I found the backfiring was actually flames shooting out of the carbs. It was okay above 4000rpm but went flat beyond eight grand. Turned out the valve timing was out a couple of teeth, the camchain had been incorrectly fitted.

The dealer refused to accept this fact at first. The chief monkey was summoned to view the flames shooting out of the carbs. He scratched his groin, muttering that he'd never seen anything like it before. They put it right for free but it took two weeks. That was more like it, fantastic acceleration and no more trying to imitate a flame-thrower. I'd been forced to commute on a borrowed Puch Maxi, so the XJ650 appeared brilliant for the first few days.

Another tour began in earnest, with just over 50,000 miles on the clock. Across from Birmingham into the wild Welsh hills, mostly deserted in early October. I'd fitted a huge windscreen on the bars which kept the worst of the weather off. The XJ still put out a lot of secondary vibes, not so much fierce as chronic. I blamed these buzzes for breaking the fairing brackets. It fell downwards, whacked the top of the mudguard then became enveloped in the front wheel.

The force on the bars was like being hit by a jack-hammer. I went from doing 35mph to a standstill without even the time to scream in protest. This happened going along a deserted mountain track with only the sheep for company. They ignored the sight of myself being thrown over the bars. I lost my momentum by rolling off the road and down a steep mountainside. Several thorny bushes impeded my progress.

It'd been dead easy to break a leg or have the XJ fall on top of myself. In that respect I was lucky. The XJ had stayed on the track after rolling over a few times. I crawled up the hill, which in my delirious state appeared near vertical. The XJ was still in one piece, but with some deep dents, broken ancillaries and bent bars and pegs. The engine bars had repaid their cost a hundred times over. I kicked it straight and carried on with the tour, swearing to myself never, ever, to fit a touring screen again.

Over the next few months I sorted out the bent bits. By then the XJ was sporting 60,000 miles, deemed only reliable enough for the ten miles a day commute. I'd never really become used to the disc brakes, especially in the wet, but using the back brake and engine braking under normal circumstances provided an approximation of sane retardation. The calipers needed a strip, clean and rebuild every 10 to 12,000 miles, the worse the weather the more frequent the chore.

Other than that, by then I was a dab hand at throwing the somewhat reluctant XJ through the town traffic. It wasn't the quickest steering beast in the world but the handling was generally neutral with few nasty surprises up its sleeve. Under emergency conditions, when some bugger does a sudden U-turn or a pedestrian steps out of nowhere, using all three brakes and knocking down the gears, invariably pulled me up in time.

Another sixteen months went by, with 78000 miles piled up, until fuel was down to 30mpg and the exhaust was smoking like a jet-fighter. There were several options available - rebuild the motor, replace it with a lower mileage mill, ride the bike into the ground or sell it while it was still saleable. Rust was beginning to get a grip on the chassis components and the cutting out in the wet had returned with a vengeance.

Sell it, I decided. I'd already had my money's worth several times over but it wasn't the kind of bike that I felt any deep affection for, it had too much of the universal Japanese four in its make-up for that. No way I was willing to strip it down to its frame and crankshaft and then spend hundreds, maybe thousands, on a complete rebuild. I kept it running until all the consumables were worn out and then put an advert in the local paper for £200. It sold within the hour and I had hundreds of phone calls. The general design and layout was sufficiently impressive for me to buy a one year old XJ900.

Keith Ealing

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It took me 82000 miles to break my Yamaha XJ650. I had suspected that the top end would give out first. The valves had started going out of adjustment every 700 miles come 75000 miles. Previously they had only needed attention every 10,000 miles. I once left them for twice that distance without any problems.

There again, the way the oil was being burnt off at 100 miles a pint suggested the bores and pistons were well past their prime. Top speed had long, since about 60,000 miles, been lowered to a mere 105mph instead of 125mph in its prime. Acceleration was still fine up to 80mph, slacking off and vibrating merrily thereafter.

The relatively simple two valve, DOHC engine didn't run to the sophistication of balancers. Hadn't really needed to in the early days, able to cruise along reliably, even smoothly, at 90mph all day long. Fuel that was being run through the engine at around 30mpg in the final days made a joke of any touring pretensions the XJ once boasted.

When I'd first bought the machine, I'd luxuriated in its smell of newness and the sophistication of its shaft drive. After a series of dismal if not dangerous hacks I felt I had at last arrived. That feeling had soon faded, though, when the suspension lost most of its tautness. Took only 18 months and 13000 miles for the bike to start wobbling and weaving. The forks were worn out, the seals leaking profusely after only a few hundred miles. The shocks were, er, shockingly soggy. The shaft drive would hit them with its inertia, trying to roll the bike right off the road when banked over.

I resented every penny I had to pay out for an XJ900 front end and pair of Koni shocks. The transformation in handling soon had me in better spirits. They have lasted well, too, there when the motor stopped running in a big way. Had no end of problems with the discs and calipers, though, but when they were set up properly they worked fine. Loads of power and only the slightest of wet weather delay with EBC pads, which last 12000 miles out front and about twice that at the back. Mainly, because the latter spent a good half of its time well and truly seized up. I trained myself not to use it....

I found the handling quite predictable and safe, although not on the OE Jap rubber which was quickly junked in favour of a pair of Venoms. Tyres usually bettered 10,000 miles, although in the last 15000 miles I've had to change them every 8000 miles. Beyond that the wear turned the chassis into an evil little twitcher.

Both paint and chrome have survived surprisingly well given the hard life the bike has suffered. I insisted on riding through ice cold winters and the wettest of springs. The cast wheels were a horror story, after the guarantee expired, proving impossible to clean up. Still, from a distance the bike could pass for a low mileage Yamaha. Especially as I got a mate to make up stainless steel 4-1 down-pipes. The Yamaha's gone through about half a dozen used silencers, rarely lasting for more than a year. Even had one fall off. Fantastic, animal roar resulted in my being chased around the council estate until I did a runner down a narrow alleyway. They could probably have kept track of me from miles away, the din the XJ was making, but must've been called away to something more urgent. The 4-1 exhaust had an effect on the carbs at low revs until I'd punched some holes in the airfilter. Well, it seemed like a good idea, but doubtless accelerated bore wear, not that it made much difference in the end.

Even with 60,000 miles on the clock I saw no reason why I shouldn't do a 5000 mile cruise in Europe. I had by then adopted a very laid back attitude and wasn't going to push the XJ anywhere near its limits. 70-80mph was the most I expected from the aged motor.

I'd been in Europe before and had learnt a suitable incantation to make sure I stayed on the correct side of the road. The first two weeks were great fun, mainly as I'd persuaded a Belgian girl I met on the ferry that it would be a ball for her to go home via France, Spain and then France again. In fact, she so tired me out that doing a couple of hundred miles on the XJ became my refuge from her constant demands.
After one particularly violent morning of passion in a small French hotel, we were rumbling down to the Italian border when this bloody great yellow Volvo appeared from nowhere, hogging my side of the road. I had time to note, not particularly surprised, that it had UK plates. The barbarian blasted his horn at us as if he was completely within his rights to run us off the road.

The upshot of that adventure was that I had to ride the XJ into a ditch. The violent way the front wheel was stopped threw me over the bars, the left-hand grip catching me between the legs. Through the tears and howling I saw that the girl had been even less lucky. She ended trapped under the machine with a broken leg. The police turned up minutes later and I was plunged into the depths of French bureaucracy. I was lucky to get out without being charged with attempted murder.

The XJ was bruised and dented rather than bent when the pigs finally gave me back the bike. I was impressed with its toughness until safely back in my garage in the UK I discovered the cast wheel was full of hairline cracks. I had sped home on a potentially lethal machine with a totally misplaced grin on my face once back on good old English soil. The breakers provided a replacement for thirty notes.

The bike was disaster free until its ultimate demise which was even more painful than the Frog incident. I had noticed, couldn't help noticing, that the gearchange was turning very harsh and unpredictable. With a bit of practice I had even perfected the art of sliding the locked-up back wheel around corners when I cocked up downchanges! A sometimes terrifying experience. There was enough slack in the transmission to get a BMW R60 owner high!

I was whacking down through the box, one sunny Sunday afternoon when there was a sudden, searing crunching of metal between my feet. The back tyre screamed as it locked solid, the XJ twitching so violently that I was thrown clean off the bike as it flew down the road. Oops. A nasty dose of gravel rash lacerated my frail body but no bones were broken.

There was nothing left that could be salvaged. I pulled the engine out, intrigued to find the cause of the failure. The gearbox internals and primary drive were mangled beyond belief. The rest of the mill was as worn out as the chassis was twisted, bent or cracked.

Despite that, I've little hesitation in recommending any of the XJ series - as long as they have less than 50,000 miles on the clock and had some decent suspension mods, there should be plenty of life left in them even if they've been abused.

Mike

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When you buy a 1983 Yamaha XJ650 for two hundred notes you don't expect too much. Especially when it has been around the clock despatching. Two days after taking delivery of the shaft drive four disaster struck. There was this crunching noise running through the engine as we lurched through town. It went away for a moment then the motor locked up solid. By the time I'd grabbed the clutch, the 450lb hack had slewed to a halt.

Car drivers forced out of their reverie by this sudden retardation were not too amused. Horns blared and fists emerged out of side-windows. No- one rushed out to help me push the heap into the gutter. With an excess of corroded discs sticking on and massive clutch drag, this was no easy act. Not to mention that I'm the proverbial 9 stone weed who gets sand kicked into his face. The end result was that we cleared the road for annoyed car drivers by collapsing into a heap on the pavement.

Fortunately, I landed on top of the bike rather than it laying me out flat. Mind you, the third degree burns from the fuming engine did not exactly endear the beast to me. The gaggle of pedestrians who were displaced by the falling Yamaha were even less elated. Not one offered to help me pull the XJ upright. This had become quite important because fuel was streaming out of the petrol tank. With extreme effort I managed to right the Yamaha before it exploded. The good old AA eventually took us home.

After about two weeks my back had recovered sufficiently to allow me to stagger out of bed. Were it not for the fact that I was completely broke I would have pulped the bike into a million pieces. Some kind friends volunteered to pull the engine out and help me with the strip. I cringed every time one of them whacked a seized in screw with the hammer and chisel.

To cut short a long story, the problem was caused by a pattern oil filter breaking up. It may just have been that it had not been changed for years, but I made damn sure to stomp up for an OE filter after that experience. Bits of the filter had found their way into the gearbox. One of gears was missing teeth where it had seized on the wire mesh. Other bits of the filter were found bunging up various oilways. Luckily, the gearbox seizure occurred before the top end or crank had time to be seriously damaged.

Otherwise, the general condition of the engine was surprisingly good. It looked like the DR had been telling the truth when he said that he'd recently put in a new cam chain. The bores were heavily worn in places, the rings a bit gummed up and the camshafts scored. None of it was serious enough to warrant replacement. Anyway, a new filter and can of oil all but blew my budget out of the window.

A mate agreed to let me borrow the front end off his seized XJ650....mine was so far gone the handling went crazy above 65mph. Another mate, used to a devious Kawa H1 500 triple, reckoned it was much worse than his machine! This new front end had been completely refurbished 2500 miles ago. Once the engine was back in the frame, I found the motor ran as before except that third gear made some desperate noises. It was so fearsome that I always booted straight up from second to fourth.

Or tried to anyway. However good the box might've been when new, with 122,000 miles done it was now horrible. It needed a really hefty boot to make it shift, more often than not finding a false neutral. The large amount of torque from the 653cc engine enabled the machine to run along in fourth for most of the time. Careful control of the throttle enabled the XJ to roll off from as little as 20mph. After a hard day's riding I have been known to ferociously slip the clutch from a standstill in fourth. It was less hassle than trying to play games on the ever so tired box. Fifth was dubious, because even when engaged there was a strong likelihood of it slipping out of gear. First gear had the reverse problem, it would often lock the gearbox up solid. The only way around that was to turn off the engine, rock the bike back and forth, using a hand on the gear lever to whack the bike back into neutral. Luckily, the bike could take off in second with no need to abuse the clutch.

This sounds like a pretty horrendous problem, but it didn't intrude into my enjoyment half as much as the engine cutting out in the wet. The direct action of the shaft drive encouraged the back wheel to lock up when the engine went dead. As this, by its very nature, happened on wet roads some very frightening skids occurred. Although large and heavy, the XJ was surprisingly easy to control with its improved front end. The back featured relatively new Koni-Dial-A-Rides, so no problem there. Stability and flickability were of a level that I escaped any doses of tarmac fever.

In the 10 months I've owned the XJ I never did discover the reason why it kept cutting out. There seemed nothing inherently wrong with the electrical system. She always started rapidly on the electric boot and I did not even experience any blown bulbs. I tried coating the coils and HT leads with a silicone sealant, but the problem persisted. Spraying everything with WD40 reduced the cutting out to about once a week rather than a couple of times a day.

This effect at least meant I never found riding the XJ boring. It was far too unpredictable a beast for that. The Yam wouldn't pull more than the ton, which was about as fast as I'd feel like going on a machine of this mileage. My left hand always hovered over the clutch. When new the motor put out over 70 horses, but acceleration felt more like 45 to 50hp were available. Unfortunately, fuel didn't match that prognosis. 30 to 35mpg were the norm, occasional mad blasts wrecking it further, 25mpg all too easily attained.

As the carbs needed balancing every 500 miles I suspect that they were badly worn, the main cause of the appalling economy. As the chassis became most temperamental on less than 3mm of tread, tyre life was also horrendous. Not much more than 5000 miles could be achieved on either Metz's, Pirellis or Avons. The shaft drive often whined and lurched annoyingly, which was cured, more or less, after adding some oil to the near empty housing.

Finish isn't worth talking about on such a well used and abused machine. Where I could, I touched it up with Hammerite. The degenerate appearance did provide the local rozzers with some mild amusement. They finally got fed up with trying to find a mechanical rather than a cosmetic fault. Over 18000 miles of thrashing the bike proved itself remarkably tough. Even the valvegear didn't need any attention. They had already worn as much as they were going to wear and decided to settle down nicely.

Eventually, my mate had fixed his XJ650 engine, demanding that I give him back his front end. He wasn't too amused to find that the calipers were sticking on and the pads out of life. In the meantime I had put stiffer springs in the original forks and cleaned up the old calipers. Braking was just about equal to the available performance. At least in the dry, wet weather was a different story. The front brake became like an on-off switch. Either massive braking force or nothing whatsoever.

I was forced to use engine braking and the rear brake. Not an altogether successful strategy, as thrashing down the box usually put the bike in a false neutral. Using the front brake in emergencies meant I had to fight a skidding front wheel. After a month of this self abuse my hair started to turn white! My hands were about as steady as the XJ's tickover. I kept annoying the local breakers by demanding calipers but most of them were in as sad a state as my own.

Salvation only came when my mate seized his engine again. Laugh? I almost pissed myself. Especially as he was so annoyed with the repeat performance he let me take the machine off his hands for a mere hundred notes. The cunning bugger took his nearly new tyres off first, mind, sticking some old Jap rubber on in their place. His chassis was in much better shape than mine, having only done 45000 miles. The obvious move was to put my engine and wheels in his frame. That put the braking back to being predictable in the wet and improved the overall handling.

The cause of his engine seizure remains a mystery. He didn't thrash his machine, did regular services and knows a lot about engines. Both times the pistons have melted into the bores. I have stripped the engine right down, next time I have to pull my motor apart I will fit his gearbox internals. It would be very nice to have a full complement of gears.
T
hat's the state of play as I write this. I have a somewhat tired engine in a nice chassis. Until I bought the second bike I just figured on riding the Yamaha into the ground. Now I've got a mass of spares it has become an entirely different proposition. Although XJ engines are not entirely lacking in problems, they seem to run for high mileages given a bit of care and attention. The damn thing still cuts out in the wet on occasion, which is my only serious complaint at the moment. The rest of the idiosyncrasies I can take as they come at me. I have a feeling I will get the damn beast past the 200,000 mark!

Graham Jones

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There are electrical burn outs. And then there are electrical burn outs! This one happened at a happy 60mph. The XJ thrumming along gently and the sun shining brightly. A beautiful day to be alive and out on a motorcycle. Until? Until I smelt burning. I looked around hopefully. Some deadbeat in a cage going up in flames? Nope. Some farmer burning his crop under EEC orders? Nope. When the flames began to lick my thighs I finally, dolefully, looked down.

Panic descended rapidly. My mind went blank. I swayed the big, corpulent 650cc four all over the road. Horns blared as cagers tried to get a better view of the imminent entertainment. Brake, thought I. So I did. Like a lemming gently led over the cliff edge, the Yamaha howled its tyres and made for the grass verge. Singed marital tackle imminent. I got up on the pegs then stepped off at about 30mph. The bike went sideways. Finishing off the day's work by trying to snap my shin bone in half.

Not one cager bothered to offer a helping hand. And one was definitely needed. See, the poor old Yam had demolished a hedge. Embedded itself in a minor pool. Which at least had put the fire out. I wasn't that surprised that she'd gone up in flames. The electrics had been bodged with components meant for a car. Frayed wiring repaired with insulation tape and hope. The battery was almost certainly original and half dead.

My injuries were superficial. Singed trousers and bruised leg. Nothing to get hysterical over, I kept telling myself. I was a big, macho motorcyclist now. Which was no consolation when I did my back in pulling the XJ free from the swamp. The bright sun didn't help either. Leaving me soaked in sweat.

Of course, the chances of starting a dripping wet motorcycle with burnt out electrics were entirely predictable. Zero. That didn't stop me trying for a bump start a couple of times. Which just pulled more muscles. Who should come along just as I was about to put a match in the petrol tank? Swampy! A subspecies who lived out of the back of a Plastic Pig van. Smelt like his other home was a sewer. Swampy liked to think himself a bit of a Wideboy in the Trotter tradition (hence the three-wheeler).

After refusing his offer of fifty quid to take it off my hands, we discovered there was no way to fit an XJ650 into the back of a Plastic Pig. This was when the tow rope magically appeared. I've done some absurd things in my life but never more so than being towed twenty miles by a Reliant three-wheeler. In fact, most of the way home it was a two-wheeler, the mass of the Yam making it sit up and beg. We really needed a couple of cop cars as escort. So much road space did we take up.

After the usual ritual abuse session, we parted on the best of terms. My large collection of dead electronic parts were scavenged for working bits. The molten battery was levered out from between the frame tubes. Only coming clear because it finally disintegrated. As did the sidepanels, seat and remaining wiring. Oops. Did I mentioned that part of the advanced state of decline was down to 81000 miles of tender loving care (not...)?

I managed to resurrect the beast on the minimum of dosh. As usual. The XJ650 was never well regarded by those in the know. Which was why I liked it. As it made them cheap. Its major failings were found in the handling and braking (I got the bike at 45000 miles, don't know what it was like new). Soggy suspension interacted with a raging shaft drive not at all benignly. The front end was a pogo-stick waiting to fall apart. Nothing a hefty pair of rear shocks and stiff springs couldn't cure.

The brakes were more difficult. A pair of twin front discs that could barely contain the 450lbs of solid beef. The discs were worn thin. The calipers inclined to locking on. The pads had seen better days. EBC's, new brake fluid and cleaned up calipers helped.

Until it rained. When the interaction of pads and discs was like steel on steel. Ugly frown lines soon formed on my forehead and rapid hair loss had the hair transplant surgeons forming a hopeful line. Cheap biking at speed equals rapid ageing. Take your choice.

Engine braking was thankfully good. Or it would've been had not the shaft drive tried to bounce the back wheel through the seat. A major achievement given that the springs barely moved with two giant bikers on the saddle. The Yam wasn't one of those bikes that could be flipped through holes in traffic with gay abandonment. It had the same kind of precise, fluid steering as a horse and cart.

A used set of discs aided the braking but they soon went off again. The calipers were scrap as well... This is what you need, lad, shouted the breaker as he hurled an XS1100 front end at me. As it was valuable (ie over a hundred quid), I staggered under its weight and didn't let it fall to the shit strewn garage floor. A weekend was blown getting everything to fit. The brakes now worked almost as well as a low end cage's.

Having sorted the handling and braking to a degree that allowed me to use all of the 70 horses, I then began to worry over the engine. The clattering top end and smoky exhaust indicated a major stripdown was due. On the other hand, 130mph on the clock and enough stomp to see off an XJ600S indicated that all was well. Sod it. Leave it alone and see how well it goes.

That was 36000 miles ago. I haven't touched the valves or the carbs. Done 3000 mile oil changes. Only because I don't like gearboxes full of false neutrals. True, top speed's down to a mere 125mph unless the gods summon up a following hurricane. Which anyway would probably cause the motor to stutter. This is one motorcycle that sure hates wet weather. Reluctant starting and cutting out adding to the woes of disappearing braking. The major upside, at least it's never boring!

Given its speed and chassis nastiness, accidents are almost inevitable. The XJ's quite a solid old bus. Can roll down the road, take the side off a car and generally induce cardiac arrest in the cagers, and still come back for more. In particular, the XS1100's front end must be praised for the way it could whack into the side of cages without bending or breaking. Marvellous chaps, car designers, making a cage with a soft, crumple zone that's allowed me to ride away from many an accident (we aren't going to mention insurance, at this point, are we?)

One knowledgeable soul reckoned the forks were twisted but I couldn't see it myself. The bike kept passing its MOT so it must be okay. Right? Well, okay, I always took my nubile sister along for the ride and she has a pair on her that inspire incest. Or maybe it's the tank paint that still shines brightly - uniquely compared to the rest of the rotting heap, I might add. No, I'm sure that layer of white rot's really there to protect the engine alloy.

I get some funny looks from guys on modern bikes. Especially when I burn them off. They probably can't believe the amount of fun I get out of such an old horror. But XJ650's are tough, have a surprising excess of torque and power with the expected brutish handling and diabolical braking. Also they are cheap to buy and run. £500 to £1000 buys something in reasonable nick if somewhat tatty. Thereafter, running costs are just down to the tyres (10,000 miles plus) pads (less than 5000 miles) and fuel at around 45mpg, plus all those oil changes. Sod all in terms of modern motorcycling and an absolute blast in terms of kicks per pound. A dying breed, get one while you still can. You can have mine for a grand if you want!

Adrian Slocombe
 
 
 
 

Yamaha XJ550


I normally avoid dealers as a source of used bikes because of the huge mark-ups charged for the dubious benefit of a warranty, but a low mileage Yam XJ550 caught my eye and after a bit of haggling I paid £750 for a bike which was just over three years old, had two new tyres, a Krauser rack and 12 months t and t.

I must admit to thinking I had a bargain as I gingerly rode home and locked the bike in the garage. Had I? I decided not, soon afterwards a new O-ring chain was needed and then the original exhaust disintegrated, especially displeasing as I had meticulously examined it before buying. I am presently training my hamster to climb into exhausts and inform me whether rust breakthrough is imminent.

A black chrome Neta was installed. I can't say I noticed any change in performance but the Neta was significantly quieter than the knackered original and the bike looked really stylish with its black and orange tank, black engine and rack. The next few months were spent whizzing around and getting to know the XJ.The best aspect of the bike is the seating position - the narrow engine relative to its peers allows footrests far enough in to give good clearance whilst low enough to allow plenty of leg-room

With lowish bars I found the bike the most comfortable I've ever owned, being both manageable around town and excellent on long, fast runs for my average build (5'8"). I can do the 150 miles between fuel stops without any discomfort and have had no complaints from the pillions. Secondary vibes are no problem, although you're always aware of the engine whirring away underneath you.

The fact that the XJ was the only bike I've ever owned that I didn't regularly thrash to see what it'd do gives an idea of how much fun the thing was to ride at relatively sane speeds. In 14 months and 9000 miles I can't recollect trying to go over 110mph, which might explain the 53mpg average (useful because of the small, 3.5 gallon tank).

The best test of the bike was a ten day tour of Ireland undertaken in early September, which was the wettest month I've ever known. Loaded up with a gaudy silver tankbag and a holdall strapped to the pillion seat, the XJ still handled okay and felt safe even in the torrential downpour, at least until the tankbag started to try to slide underneath the tank and ferocious crosswinds started up. Two hours of that combination proved only that determination to enjoy oneself can overcome many an obstacle.

Luckily, by the time I'd reached Bridgend it had cleared up and I was happy enough to zoom up the M4 to the A40 and thence to Fishguard. Along one particularly twisty bit of the A4 the headlamp decided to go AWOL. There was an intermittent fault on both main and dip which demanded frantic switching between the two, accelerating when I thought the problem gone and braking sharply when I was plunged into darkness. The sheep must have thought the farmer had slipped some LSD into their meal, being woken from their slumber by a heavily laden, flashing pogo-stick careering along.

When it was working, there's enough light for up to 70mph on unlit roads. Otherwise, the switches all worked very efficiently. Luckily, I had time to spare and there was a bright moon - I safely crawled the last 15 miles with no headlamp on and joined the queue for the ferry at 2am.

Once in Eire I soon found out that red lights were regarded as merely a mild warning that something might possibly be coming the other way, and also that the country was in the grip of a monsoon. Real Guinness is a lot different to the stuff you get here, the pubs and nightclubs are great, if expensive, fun and the people much more friendly than in the UK.

Luckily, I had a place to stay at my uncle's in Abbeyfeale and only reluctantly left there to ride to Dublin some days after my arrival. The Yamaha had to cope with more rain, manic driving and lots of twisty roads in pleasant scenery, all of which it managed with aplomb.

As always the XJ seemed to suit my temperament perfectly, being as happy with humdrum, laid back riding in town or down country lanes as it was being thrashed to the redline, two up. Power there was aplently beyond 6000rpm, but also there was enough low speed torque to make it a buzz to just canter along in a high gear. It could cruise at 90mph, albeit with little urge to accelerate rapidly beyond that speed, or murmur along at 30mph in top gear.

Back home in Southampton I had a good look at the bike. Two weeks of neglect and thrashing, mostly in the rain, had taken its toll. The black chrome on the exhaust was only visible in the very few areas that weren't caked in dirt, the wheels were a bit oxidized and the chrome bars and forks already had the dreaded spots of rust. However, this being a bike of the early plastic era and therefore easy to clean, the rest was only plastered in shit and after a weekend spent cleaning it off, it was almost as clean as before the trip.

The headlamp problem - the bulb blowing - was repaired with a new fixing bracket, apparently the one fitted was not standard and had been badly fitted, so other XJs aren't likely to have the same problem. Later on that year, I fitted an excellent Morgan screen for about £50 which didn't upset the handling one iota and made the bike much more pleasant to ride in the winter. I sold the bike after 14 months riding when I decided to buy something bigger and got £700 for it.

Handling was always good - the bike has a nice balanced feel, heavy enough not to get thrown about by bumps or winds, but not so heavy that it became a pig to push around or ride slowly in town. It could be earholed through bends without excessive muscle and if you had to brake suddenly when leant over it was still controllable, with only a slight tendency to sit up. Obviously, these bikes are getting on now and benefit from some decent rear shocks and tauter fork springs. The fork seals go quite often so gaiters are a good bet.

The engine is relatively simple - only eight valves to adjust, the carbs stay in balance for ages and the ignition is electronic. Camchains last at least 40,000 miles, and even if they do go they can be split and replaced without doing a whole engine strip (yes, I know you can do it on most fours but you can do it using a stock camchain on this one).

The motors have a good reputation for reliable service and there are some bikes around with over 100,000 miles up. There are some despatch bikes in a terrible state which keep on running. My impression of the engine was that it was unburstable. If the engine isn't noisy or smoky it's probably a good 'un.

Don't be put off by high mileages too much, as long as it's had regular (1000 mile) oil changes it should be okay. Do beware, though, of bikes with a poor gearchange, a sure sign of high mileage abuse.

Consumables are not too bad. The rear drum shoes last for so long they have the reputation for never being touched, the front pads do 6-8000 miles depending on abuse level. The discs do actually work in the wet without any of the frightening lag of some bikes, whilst calipers are more resistant to corrosion than Suzuki units and the discs don't wear away rapidly like some Hondas. The back tyre lasted for 10,000 miles, the front will do much more. The chain (O-ring) does 10,000 miles plus.

Overall then, much cheaper to run than the even more reliable but sluggish GS550 series. Maybe not as fast as a GPz550, but they are cheaper to buy and last just as long. As you may have surmised, I would recommend an XJ550 to anyone. I personally would jump at the chance of one like I bought for the same money but there aren't many offers like that around nowadays. Whichever way you look at it, on paper or on the road, the XJ550 will always have its place.

R.M.Simpson

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It all depends on what you need from a motorcycle and how much you can afford to spend. Five years ago I had 500 notes to spare and a yearning to travel. A sensible motorcycle with a bit of go and rock solid reliability was needed. The 1982 Yam XJ550 that appeared in the local paper wasn't my first choice, as I find these kind of universal Japanese motorcycles need a touch too much throttle for long distance riding.

Seven years of abuse had been confined to one owner and 14000 miles. Tarnished alloy on the engine covers, a bit of paint flaking off the frame and a rusty OE exhaust were the only signs of age. The XJ had more midrange torque than I expected and was such an easy bike to ride first time out that I decided to go for it before someone else turned up.

Not being entirely stupid I decided a few thrashes around England were in order before heading for the Continent. The most obvious discord was a seat that had sod all padding and turned my backside raw after just 50 miles. There was also a lot of secondary vibration at 90mph, through the pegs and bars, and a revvy feel to the motor that wasn't going to be very relaxing when doing 500 miles in a day.

A King & Queen seat, thicker grips and peg rubbers, and a new chain and sprocket set with bigger gearbox and smaller wheel sprockets. 90mph cruising was a good 1000 revs lower, almost vibration free and my backside was better off even than when lounging around in my favourite chair. The stock bars and pegs were an excellent compromise between slow and high speed work, only likely to cause arm strain in excess of 95mph, such speed rigorously avoided in deference to the machine's age and my still pristine driving licence.

As I was travelling solo I modified the rack so that half of it was over the pillion seat, allowing me to avoid an overhang of excess mass. The rear shocks were Koni's but sufficiently aged to be past their prime, so I put the really heavy stuff in a large tank bag.

There followed 6000 miles of excessive self indulgence in which the XJ received only two oil changes. Open road work, at speeds up to 90mph, turned in 60mpg whilst the consumables hardly seemed to wear at all. I ended up in the Scandinavian countries, having a great time with lots of new sights, sounds and sensations. The XJ was good for 300 miles a day before I began to become tired, but as much as 500 miles was done without really injuring myself.

Coming back to Blighty was a real downer, not just because of the weather. With 24,330 miles done the camchain began to rattle. I bodged the tensioner, which worked for all of 15 miles. I was really worried by the time I pulled up at home, the bike reluctant to do more than 55mph. To its credit it got me home. A new tensioner and camchain strained the budget but were necessary as the bike had to earn its keep doing the commuting chores.

The next year I was all set for a blast down to Spain, leaving the UK with 31000 miles on the clock and coming back with 39000 miles. I knew something was wrong on the return journey, fuel plummeting to 40 and then 35mpg. By the time we were home smoke was pouring out of the 4-1 exhaust I'd bought over the winter.
Hmmmmm! The exhaust valves were not seating because they were burnt around their edges. Secondhand valves and a new gasket set sorted the otherwise good engine out.

1991 was all hard work and no motorcycle fun, the XJ just clocking up commuting miles, ending the year with a rather naff gearbox action and 47000 miles. By then I had a firm idea of consumable wear. A chain and sprocket set lasted 15000 miles, rear Roadrunners 10,000 miles and front 12000. EBC pads went for around 16000 miles. A valve and carb job was done every 7500 miles, more out of paranoia than any necessity.

English winters took their toll on the finish, though, the XJ often resembling a rat bike, needing loads of patching, caliper rebuilds and excessive polishing. In the spring of '92 it began to misfire, going down to a mere two cylinders. This took an excess of effort to track down, as it usually cleared up when I tried to find the cause. Finally, when it was permanently turned into a 275cc twin I zeroed in on the coils, replacements solving the problem.

XJ electrics can turn quite malicious at high miles, as shown when my bike hit the 55000 mile mark. The cause was rotting insulation allowing wires to short out. Blowing lights and fuses were the first signs, followed by a dead battery with warped plates. Rewire time. Putting in the new battery I connected up the negative side first and then trapped the spanner between the positive side and the frame. Massive sparking as it shorted out, my mind going totally blank as I leapt back from the arcing. Eventually I got my act together by prising off the spanner before it became welded in position. The battery survived the abuse without any apparent ill-effects.

To celebrate the machine's survival I took off for Italy. What a disaster that was. The exhaust fell to piece giving the Wop cops an excuse to go rabid. At one point I was almost convinced they wanted sexual favours (Italian men being a bit infamous for that sort of thing) but a large wedge of dosh sufficed. Another wedge went on having the downpipes welded and a Ducati 'silencer' knocked on the end. It looked okay but needed fifth at 1500 revs in town to avoid more police retribution.

Then the petrol tank rusted through on the underside, leaving me astride a rolling fireball as flames flicked up from the engine. If I hadn't been wearing full leathers I would've been burnt to a cinder in a very sensitive place. The Italian cagers went berserk on their horns at the curious sight. I rushed for the side of the road and leapt off before the Yam came to a halt. Luckily, it'd been on reserve so the fuel soon ran out. The fire had taken out lots of my new wires, the fuel lines and the airfilter box. Anyway, the bike was bodged back together by another Ducati mechanic who deemed a Benelli tank suitable.

By the time I returned home to England the clock read 54000 miles and I thought our relationship was nearing an end. But the bike ran well to the end of the year and 59000 miles. 1993 saw some mild touring around the UK, including a 24 hour End to End run that left me knackered and the engine bleeding oil from the cylinder head gasket. As I had to whip off the head, a new camchain and tensioner, as well as gasket, were fitted. The valves needed regrinding and the hardening on the cam lobes was just beginning to show signs of wear!

At the end of '93 someone offered me 600 notes for the 68000 mile machine but a quick scan of MCN revealed that I would not find anything interesting with which to replace it. 1994 was a very quiet year, both in terms of mileage and maintenance chores with just 4000 miles done. Blame this on the new girlfriend who finds the whole motorcycle experience disgusting.

As I sit here writing this there are 74,231 miles on the clock and plenty of life left in the old girl (I've become used to the rattles). I've had some hard times but the good days far outnumber them. I've now got my eye on a 600 Diversion. It's that or marriage!

L.N.

****************************************************

The story starts six months previously, looking through my local paper I spy the advert, my heart misses a beat. It reads - Despatcher needed for firm in York, self employed, good rates of pay. The only problem was it was sixty miles away and I had no bike. Well, to cut out the boring bits I went for an interview, got the job and he gave me two weeks to find a suitable machine to do the work on.

Two days later, after much grovelling at various banks, I secured a loan of a grand, having been out of work for some time I was dubious about borrowing more in case any mishap should occur. Ten days later, luckily I spot an advert in my local newsagents window for a 1982 XJ550. I rush around with the readies in a pessimistic mood, having viewed at least 15 bikes in various states of mechanical and cosmetic decay, I didn't hold out much hope.

Anyway, when I arrive, my eyes beheld a machine that was in fairly good order, it was taxed and tested for ten months. It had a small handlebar fairing, twin headlamp, blue powder coated frame, 33000 miles on the clock, a bald rear tyre and no indicators. After an extensive test ride on the pillion, and then swapping over with the owner, I wanted it. Problem was, he wanted £700 and no amount of bitching about chipped frame paint, bald rear tyre and the lack of indicators would bring him down, so I reluctantly coughed up the readies.

The ride home proved to be quite pleasant, the bike pulled cleanly through all gears up to an indicated 110mph on a local piece of dual carriageway. I went to bed well pleased. The next morning I got up early as I wanted to get used to the bike before I started work on Monday morning. I push her out of the garage and press the starter, sweet bugger all happens. I start to sweat and think of other ways to pay huge loans back other than from DHSS giros. I try to bump start her and luckily she fired up after the third go. I traced the fault after an hour's prat about to the starter solenoid. Down to my local bike emporium (breaker to you and I) one solenoid, a set of indicators and a part used Metz and 45 notes and I'm ready to start work.

Now, some six months on, the XJ has covered a further 34000 miles, making the grand running total of 67,824 miles. It is my only means of transport and has coped with all kinds of road conditions whilst despatching. Punctures apart, it has never left me stranded. It does the 120 miles return trip to York from Darlington every day plus a full day's despatching, which can be running around York or doing national runs anywhere in the country, that's £1 per drop in York or 35p per mile to your destination for those who are interested (pathetic I know but better than the dole).

The downside to all this mileage is that the bike is now burning huge amounts of 10/40 oil, not helped by a leaking cylinder head, knackered shock absorbers, scored discs and, the worst for me, a gearbox which has become amazingly sloppy and vague, especially when trying to engage lower gears going up hills. Also much fun was had when trying to select gear in slow moving traffic. I think this is being caused by the output shaft now being very worn and in not meshing with the input shaft and selector.

Apart from the gearbox, a most amusing electrical fault has started to make itself known, the first sign of rain the XJ becomes a single, a twin and on the odd occasion it's designed purpose of an across the frame four. I have tried just about everything to clear this problem. The dubious faults were checked first - plugs, HT leads and even a mudflap on the front mudguard. I even relocated the coils out of the way, not to mention the electronic ignition, and cleaned and pulled apart or replaced every electrical connection I could reach, but still to no avail. I now carry a large jar of Vaseline and cans of WD40 which usually clear up the problem.

The above usually happens just as I've emerged from a junction at the head of a huge queue of traffic when the engine dies, then I'm left in no mans land at the mercy of the manic taxi drivers, Jap tourists looking for York Minster, and the odd (well, really they're all odd) ped that would rather run me over than go around me (and I'm not that fat, really). I would be interested to know if other XJ owners have suffered this problem.

The riding position is good for either town riding or motorway thrashes. The engine being narrow as are the handlebars, making it good for filtering through traffic, my wife, however, says the pillion is bloody uncomfortable and vibration does eventually numb her backside along with other discomforts which are unmentionable in a family magazine.

The switches are well set out and have given no trouble, the twin headlamp is not the same, having done a run out of York to Nottingham on the return journey, on leaving the factory I'd delivered to, I had to make a particularly tight turn in the car park - I never gave this much thought until the plod pulled me on the A604 coming out of Nottingham for having no lights; news to me on the well lit dual carriageway.

Apparently, the previous owner who'd fitted the fairing had skimped on the wiring and with all the turning, the wires had stretched out of their connections. The second time this happened was on a country road just outside Beverley on the A1070 - a tight left turn and pop go the lights. I was eternally grateful to the lady in the grey Ford Sierra who wasn't fazed when she picked me out of the dark with her headlights on the wrong side of the road, twisting the bars from left to right trying vainly to make the connection to bring the candles back on. Needless to say, I soon fixed the problem.

Apart from the electrical faults occurring in the rain, the rest of the system seems to be quite tough, take note Suzuki owners. Wear and tear has also taken its toll on the performance, as I've already said top speed was around the 110mph mark, it is now down to 95mph. Exceeding this the XJ lets me know I'm overdoing it. Also, with knackered absorbers, which are EC Streetshocks, and have done a good job but are now past it, with throwovers attached and loaded she'll wallow in fast bends and weave on straights.

Petrol consumption has also been affected. When I acquired the bike she'd do 55-60mpg, which has been drastically reduced to 32-38mpg. With the XJ's tank holding only a paltry three and half gallons my pocket can't cope with the expenditure in more ways than one. It has also started to use almost as much of Halford's Best, not helped by the leaking cylinder head and surely, by now, worn bores and pistons.

I used to change the engine oil religiously every 1000 miles (that's the only religious thing about me, my wife says) along with the oil filter. Now, however, the oil has started disappearing before the changes come around, I bung in any 10/40 oil I can find. She's now consuming about a litre every 200 miles, although I still maintain that 1000 mile changes definitely help the longevity of an engine, not to mention the aid of Slick 50, which I should have used when I bought the bike. All this said, it will still run along smoothly at 70-80mph all day, certainly a credit to an ageing Jap multi.

The camchain, believe it or not, is the original, but has turned from a nice rustle to an ominous rattle. I have rarely needed to adjust this and my motto is if it's running leave well alone, which I shall do unless it becomes too loud to ignore or it self destructs, leaving me in a fleashy heap on the byways of this England, but with the mileage on this bike I'm starting to have nightmares about when it will snap.

The valves I adjusted just after purchase and they needed no further adjustment in 33000 miles, not that I've bothered to look, mind you. The carbs have required no attention whatsoever and as they do not hamper starting or performance these too have been left well alone, although like everything else on the bike they probably don't help petrol consumption.

Other consumables have been a new set of clutch plates, these replaced with 38000 miles up and are still going strong. When new, they were so good that they made my left hand and wrist swell with the pressure that the clutch lever required - certainly not a good idea for a despatcher with a lot of town work to do, not being a believer in clutchless changes, although a few were made that week. Two new throttle cables, the first snapping on the M18 due to my rerouting it down the wrong side of the frame, the second still in place.

The brakes on the XJ are the better kind to have come out of the land of the Rising Sun, being twin discs at the front and a rear drum. The front discs are really now past their best and need replacing, being very thin and scored, but they have had an awful lot of use over the past six months. Having only owned the bike for six months I can't comment what the bike will be like over the winter or what the brakes will be like. There again, perhaps the XJ won't be around then. I've used different pads but none last longer than 8000 miles, although Dunlopads go a bit longer than most and I've been through five sets to date.

The greatest amount of readies has been spent on tyres and chains. The bike came with Roadrunners. Having changed the covers for Metzelers I was a much happier man, although even with the reduced power of late rears don't last for more than 7000 miles - when they're out of tread lurid slides can be made on the twisty bits, and much buttock movement is necessary to keep on course. Front tyres go for about 15000 miles, although I find the front will still stick on course even when the tread has gone in the centre of the tyre. I've gone through four rear covers and two front.

Chain life is also pretty poor for a bike that only knocks out 56 horses and falling, even with the correct oiling, tensioning and boiling, heavy duty chains are shagged after 8000 miles; sprockets I make last twice that distance. I keep thinking about Scotoilers. The rear wheel bearings were also renewed after purchase as were the front, again both need replacing. The rear can on the exhaust is a Laser item which is also peppered with holes and is in need of replacing. I find the prices charged for these items is scandalous and I will be implementing a repair myself, which should last until she finally expires.

Which brings me almost to the end of this story which may read like a minefield of disasters but apart from the usual consumables, the bike has astounded me with the amazing reliability of the engine. Even now, with it being so worn out, it will take me anywhere I ask and it will get me there and back without complaint, with little or no input from me.

The amount of money needed to repair her is just not viable so I'll ride it until it stops or explodes. For the money I paid for it, the XJ has been the most reliable bike I have owned - no, not as good as a Suzuki GS550 but a bloody good runner up. I would recommend it to anyone - the bike, not despatching, I'd stay well away from that game.

Beeza

****************************************************

The pig of a bike refused to start. The electric boot was threatening to flatten the battery. And I was threatening to go through the roof with rage. Turning up late for work was akin to asking for the sack. Nothing for it but the bump start. Over 400lbs of metal and the usual dragging discs. The back lane echoed to my screams as the motor contented itself with the odd stutter. Just as I was going to collapse, she caught. Boom, boom from the rotted through exhaust.

I screamed down the road, doing twice the speed limit to make up time. The wretched Yam had 92000 miles on the clock, had been rebuilt at least once. Didn't run exactly as the factory had envisaged. Top speed of a mere ton and ran out of acceleration at 80mph. It rattled and pinged like a good 'un.

Despite its age and evident abuse, it wasn't a bad bike...except that the starting was becoming as predictable as playing Russian Roulette. I wasn't sure if it was the decaying exhaust turning the mixture too lean. Or the rotting wiring or switches cutting out. Or the clogged up carbs. Or an act of God. All I was sure of was that I didn't like it!

Racing into work with seconds to spare, I forgot the new layer of gravel. Some arsehole of a contactor just dumping a lorry load on the car park, hoping the cars would compact it into the tarmac! The front wheel drifted for a while and when I tried to tug the bars lost it completely. The bike skidded on its crash-bars for a while then flipped over the other way. Throwing me off! Ouch.

The Yam butted into a nice shiny Merc! Gulp! The managing director's new auto. The engine was still ticking over, so I ignored the new dents, flipped it up and rode over to the corner provided for bikes. The MD later went into a rant about vandalism and stringing up the culprit. If he didn't come forward that instant we'd all take a pay cut to cover the repair expenses. Like a good citizen, I kept my mouth shut!

Going home, the Yam started first prod of the button. It must've felt like I did. Oppressive working conditions, to say the least. Just to rub salt into the wound, I roared past the Merc when it was stuck in traffic and gave the MD the finger! Laugh? I nearly shat myself at the silliness of it all. If I didn't keep the job I'd never be able to get my new Ducati 916, would I? Dream on!

The next day the Yam refused to start again. As it was Saturday I wasn't panicked but it was still annoying. As I'd been chased by two cop cars and had a brick thrown at me by disgruntled youths, I decided to fix the exhaust. I kicked the old silencers off and bunged on some pipes off an old CD175. Took a bit of bodging but I finally hammered them on. I took the baffles out as they were too restrictive. Were very quiet compared to the old pipes but the mill still didn't want to start easily.

I decided to bypass the whole of the ignition circuit and its switches. Wire the ignition direct with a cheapo on/off switch from Halfords. A brand new set of spark plugs also went in. Only just as it was easy to strip the threads in the head. A year's worth of rust was removed from the petrol tap. Bugger me if the engine didn't purr into life right off!

Happiness lasted as long as it took to ride down to London. 40 miles in thirty minutes. Slowed down by the horrendous traffic, see! I parked up in Soho, came back after an hour eyeing the hookers (good for a laugh, forty going on seventy with unimaginable, incurable diseases), I came back to find that the engine refused to start. Now f..king what.

In a nearby park a couple of kids dressed up as tramps took an unusual interest in me tearing my hair out. I looked down at the engine, had an inspiration. Tried changing the HT leads over. Bastards, had gone through all the bikes, pissing themselves with laughter at the riders trying to start them. As I looked around, I saw a couple of others having the same problem. I told them what had happened but by then the kids had disappeared.

One advantage of the XJ was that it looked so far gone no-one bothered to vandalize or steal it! One disadvantage of this in London was that the cops thought I was a DR, would go out of their way to pull me over. I didn't bother to stop as I could lose them through the traffic.

In fact, the bike was more or less legal. It was the coming MOT that decided me to smarten her up. Dealers selling old stock cheaply are a great source of bargains. For a hundred notes I was able to buy a new tank, panels, guards, seat, chainguard, fork seals and cables. Looked really smart by the time I'd done the business. Just as well that I'd changed the tank, the old one was just about ready to rust through. Nothing like good timing!

The bike sailed through its MOT, the fool of a tester complimenting me on the way I'd devoted my life to looking after the Yam. The four cylinder mill was still a source of concern. All that top end rattling and smoke on the overrun. I religiously changed the oil every 750 miles and equally reliably ignored the rest of the maintenance chores. Well, it was Japanese...I'd once done exactly the same trick with a Guzzi V50, ended up with a molten motor for my pains. The Jap's are clever engineers, you've got to give them that!

After about eighteen months of thrashing I finally had a look at the top end. Half the valves had huge gaps, the others had closed right up. A couple of cam lobes were well pitted. And the poor old camchain pulled an inch off its top sprocket. I wished I hadn't looked!

Being an optimistic fool, I decided to whip the cylinder head off. Half the valves had sunk into the head, the others pitted beyond help. There was also a huge crack in the cylinder head and evidence that it had been welded up in a couple of other places. Cry? No, but I could've taken a hammer to it.

MCN, telephone, find a couple of breakers to visit. I've never yet come across a polite breaker. Example: 'XJ550? Wot you ride one 'em for, pile of piss, sonny.' After doing the rounds, rejecting heads in an even worse state than my own, fighting with huge dogs and being insulted several times, I finally headed out of the smog. Clasping to my bosom a rather nice XJ550 head, plus camchain and tensioner. £65 poorer.

It all went together with the preciseness of a Meccano set. That is, it needed a few taps with a hammer and the torque wrench was neglected in favour of brute force and native intuition. No, no threads were stripped and the chronic head gasket oil leak was a thing of the past.

I suppose I should've fitted new barrels and pistons but I couldn't afford that. Anyway, the resulting performance wasn't in the least improved, though rattles and pinging were submerged by the rorty exhaust. About a month after the rebuild, the chassis went all loose and horrible. Ducking and diving to a whim all of its own...one of the shock's studs was rusting off! Another breaker kindly welded it back on for a tenner.

By then the bike had gone around the clock and was well past its sell-by date. I had visions of the chassis breaking up under me as I caned the bike along at the ton. A life insurer's worst nightmare! I decided I would never be able to afford the twelve grand for a new Duke, even the payments on the never-never were prohibitive. But I had almost three grand stashed - I was earning reasonable money and the XJ was cheap to run with long lasting consumables that I always bought secondhand, and 55mpg - and the Yam was worth 500 sovs.

So it had to go. No problem selling it for that kind of dosh. In its place I bought a three year old 900 Trident. A porky pig with an utterly joyous engine. All I need now is a round of weight saving, a nice alloy frame, racing fairing... The XJ550's a much underrated if rather boring motorcycle. If all you want is some cheap kicks, worth paying 500 notes for. At this age they are all a bit bruised and broken but nothing that can't be fixed cheaply. I have fond memories of mine despite the tribulations.

Roland Tramforth