For retro we should read real motorcycles. And the definition of a real motorcycle is one that impresses more with its torque than power. In some instances this is just an excuse for getting away with antique engineering (who mentioned Harley?). The M900 makes a mere 75 horses at just over 7000 revs but has massive low and midrange punch, the engine basically identical to the well proven (dry clutch aside) 900SS. The only area in which it's really retro is that it has a stripped naked look.
The layout of the Ducati's ninety degree engine makes any styling effort difficult, the back cylinder all but disappearing amid the tubular frame and ancillaries. The castings on the motor are not very attractive, the lines of the frame and engine being in conflict......all the more shocking, then, that the Monster is such a stunning looker. The huge petrol tank and pared down rear end contrast with the silver frame whilst the meaty upside-down forks dominate the front end.
If the styling looks a bit extreme, the riding position is quite conventional and reasonably natural. Town riding was a breeze. There was an excess of torque that made crazed used of the gearbox redundant. Weighing about 430lbs the Ducati was just light enough to chuck around in town, whilst the suspension was up to coping with the mad machinations of council neglect upon the rutted road surface.
After a couple of days of becoming used to the machine, I found I could ride through town in a thoroughly delinquent manner. Doing wheelies in the first couple of gears was just a twist of the throttle away and so good was the balance of the M900 that even on the back wheel it felt reassuring. When the cagers did something really stupid the twin front discs and single rear would pin the bike down like nothing else I'd experienced. The four piston Brembos are usually found on much bigger bikes, so with the minimal mass they slammed the bike to a halt.
The frame and forks had to be good to absorb that kind of violence. The massive upside-down forks had a rigidity, a resistance to twisting, that most motorcyclists can only dream about. The wrap-around tubular frame, with its excess of cross-bracing and use of the crankcases as a stressed member, held everything in line, giving the impression that it could take twice the power.
Any company can specify top notch suspension and, these days, make extremely stiff frames, but what counts is having the experience to put it all together in a way that optimizes steering geometry, weight distribution and suspension settings. Ducati have wads of experience both on the road and track, and in almost every way the narrow vee-twin engine is much more suitable for perfecting the chassis layout.
Like the 900SS, the Monster comes across, almost immediately, as a special kind of bike that rides on the road in a much more secure way than the Japanese hordes with their huge across the frame four cylinder engines; emphasizes the uncanny difference of its nature with the mind warping way it lays down its torque, big hammer blows to the heart and acceleration that beats to death larger, more powerful Japanese iron.
Most Italian bikes take a time to become acquainted with, some take months before the taste for their character is acquired, but the M900, along with the 900SS, is entirely different in that respect. Within minutes of taking the controls it's Big Grin time. If Ducati made demonstrators widely available it'd sell by the boat load. Ducatis used to be full of all kinds of hidden nasties but they have managed to combine all the subtle qualities of motorcycling with an instant rapport and friendliness that gives the best of all worlds.
In town the bike will do anything you want, go into any amount of cut and thrust, ninety degree turns and running over pavements, dogs and pedestrians. And, it'll do it a damn sight better than any other machine that weighs over 400lbs. True, across London antics, hustling through snarled up traffic for a couple of hours, would turn my wrists a bit numb and my backside would begin to complain. The suspension was a touch stiff, but nowhere near as bad as the old bevel drive Ducatis, for constant, repetitive bouncing over rough, apparently abandoned roads.
The fat, low profile Michelins lost some of their reassuring feel when used on such roads that had taken a dose of rain. The slight slides never went right out of control but required a lot restraint both on the brake levers and the throttle. When a cage cut me up in the wet, I found the twin discs rather too powerful for the front tyre, and it also lost a little feedback just when I wanted more. This complaint was more a function of their exemplary behaviour in the dry, by way of comparison, than any defect when compared to similarly equipped Japanese bikes, which had an even harder time but were better tyred.
It was dead easy to slide the back tyre on wet roads, all it took was harsh use of the throttle or back brake. The thing was that the Duke never went out of control; was so responsive that I began to abuse the back end, controlled by a wholly adequate and multi-adjustable single shock, just for the fun of it! Wild slides woke up dozy peds and were often employed to make sprightly right-angle turns.
Having done 3000 miles on a bike that already had 1800 on the clock (at eight grand new I can't think how anyone could afford one), the back tyre is moments off going illegal and the front is about 500 miles away from following suit. Running on worn out tyres is always a good test of a motorcycle's chassis. Most Japanese bikes, even if they are near sublime when brand new, in that state become close to rolling death-traps.
The Ducati remained steady in straight lines, even flat out the weaves were so slight that they were not really worth noting. Where the tyres made a difference was in how far I could lean over. On good rubber I could get my knees down, but on the worn stuff the tyres started shuffling sideways and I had to edge the chassis upwards, causing the M900 to run wide in corners.
Even under such extremis I always felt completely in control, there was scads of feedback from the tyres, always sufficient information to know when things were getting close to going out of control. I've ridden Japanese bikes that, in the blink of an eye, have switched from apparent stability into wild wobbles. Some combination of surface irregularity, road speed and chassis wear suddenly setting them off. There was none of that frightening nonsense on the Ducati Monster.
On good tyres I couldn't really fault the bike. It'd cruise along motorways at the ton without any squirming (it'd probably do more but I wasn't able to hold on for more than a few seconds), whilst those really long, fast curves held no terrors on either a rising or falling throttle, though the brakes were a bit too snappy to use in anything other than an emergency - the front discs are probably the one thing on the bike that take a little time to really get a feel for; even now I'm often still in terror of their sheer, excessive stopping power! The pads have just started to rattle a little, so by the time 5000 miles are up I'll be buying a new set.
I'm actually quite surprised that the calipers haven't started to seize up yet. This pessimism caused by the wholly, stupidly, inadequate front mudguard, which because of the design of the upside-down forks can't easily be replaced by a more substantial item that'd be more suitable for the awful British weather rather than the Italian Riviera. Not only does the guard allow gallons of water on to the front of the engine, it seems especially designed to splatter both the calipers and the forks.
The latter were non-adjustable but that was okay as they were perfect for me. Their very stiffness must've made the act of damping the springs much easier than on conventional forks. They would absorb minor ripples and some quite large bumps, only becoming a bit lost over London sized pot-holes, which were so deep they threatened to snag the front cylinder. It would be a great pity if dirt thrown off the wheel ruined the seals, upside-down forks being even more susceptible to this trait than conventional front forks. There seemed to be no way that a pair of gaiters could be securely fitted to the legs.
The back end was much better protected from the weather, a swinging arm mounted guard keeping the worst of the muck off the single shock. Overall finish was up to Japanese standards, but the Monster was a real pain to clean, there being so many crannies into which the road grime was thrown by the front wheel. A high pressure hose seemed ideal, but a couple of minor brackets and fasteners were already speckled with the dreaded rust, so a couple of English winters might do a lot of harm.
I know that won't be a problem for the Kings Road poseurs as they'll get the Porsche out for the winter but I insist that my motorcycle is usable all year around (I can only afford to run one vehicle). Using the Duke as a high speed tourer was slightly limited by a seat that could've been better shaped and padded, but it was good enough for two hours before various muscles decided to become very cramped. At least with the M900, I had the choice of riding like a lunatic or taking it nice and laid back. The gargantuan (and, to my eyes, ugly) silencers still allowed a reasonably resonant exhaust note once on the open road and more than 80mph was on the clock, which was reassuring in the way that most vee twins are. Put it this way, I can't recall a ride that I didn't enjoy immensely, that didn't leave me wanting to leap back on the bike for more or have me looking around for a way to make the route home just that bit longer.
Country roads that twist back upon themselves are an ideal exercise ground for the M900. With its relatively low centre of gravity, it feels even lighter than its claimed 410lbs dry and can be flicked from side to side as easily as many Japanese 500 twins. Exhilarating is the best description that comes to mind, when racing with friends mounted on Japanese fours - the poor buggers have to play with their gearboxes like crazed madmen and I can almost see their arm muscles bulge under their leathers. The Ducati makes hard road-work seem easy and I had to keep trying harder to find the limits of both the chassis and the engine.
The motor's been around long enough to sort out any problems, a relatively simple two valver with belt drive to single cams. The clutch is the only really weak spot, although the belts have limited life and if oil changes are neglected the main bearings may start rumbling.
The 900SS is a bit more practical for the really fast stuff, but the M900 wins on macho looks and ease of general riding. Both are practical, almost sensible, motorcycles. I really think the world would be a better place if every home had one.
Frank Barring