At the young and tender age of 18 I passed my motorcycle test and wanted something bigger and faster. This is not difficult if your steed's a rather puny RXS 100 that needs screwing to do 70mph after being chucked out of an aircraft.
Having answered a few adverts that said excellent condition, must be seen, and then being confronted by dogs for big money, I was a little sceptical about going to see an eight year old CB350S that I spotted in my local rag. When I eventually found the bloke's house I noticed everything about it was absolutely immaculate - including the little Honda that he carefully wheeled out of his garage.
For me, the deal was done as soon as I saw it! But I did have a closer look just to check for any hidden nightmares - all I could see was more evidence of a bloody well looked after bike, including full service history and the original receipt of purchase when the bike was new.
I handed over the asking price of 1000 notes (feeling it an insult to haggle lower) and rode away on my first proper bike. After my little Yamaha, the power blew my mind - 34 horses a lot to an inexperienced novice. As I gained confidence my lack of maturity set in and my brain could be found in my right hand rather than somewhere near my eyes! The complete insanity only lasted for a month...
I was on my way to work one autumn morning, convinced I was Carl Fogarty, when the lights changed up ahead - hard braking and wet leaves don't mix particularly well as it is, but when some bastard in a Ford Fiesta jumps the lights coming the other way, things turn really nasty.
The sight of the cage coming towards me was the most terrifying moment of my short and sheltered life. I literally squealed like a pig, braced myself for some serious pain. The car's tyres scorched on the wet tarmac and the poor Honda slammed straight into it, making the most awful noise that would make even the most hardened biker cry. While all this was happening I was somersaulting through the air, admiring the view and then hitting the floor, taking all the skin off my arse.
The amount of pain I was in suggested that I was still alive but my legs were like jelly with the shock, which immobilised me for a minute or two. When I eventually got up, the cager barely let me pick the bike up before going completely apeshit and saying all sorts of things about insurance and the police. A few poison phone calls followed later but since there were no witnesses nothing ever came of it and the only money I had to fork out was for a broken indicator lens, and had a Saturday morning of stress straightening the yokes. No permanent damage done so I had faith in the bike's robustness.
The CB is a really smart looking bike with its tubular wraparound frame and nicely curved tank, powerful twin front discs and a big fat rear drum, rather interesting four spoke wheels that people seem to laugh at (takes all sorts, I suppose) and a quite sporty riding position that's also comfortable for about sixty miles. Of course, another big bonus are twin shocks that sadly now are all too rare on most bikes. In spite of all its good looks and sophisticated braking system, etc., the engine is nothing more or less than a variant on the Superdream theme.
A pity that, as Superdream engines notoriously go pop at 50,000 miles. As mine had only done 18000 miles when I bought it I wasn't that worried, and after the accident the bike was ridden mildly everywhere it went. It has to be said that the performance is bland, but then with the exception of the RD most 350's do tend to be bland; all needing a good screwing to blast through the ton!
The Honda's lack of acceleration got me done by the police for crossing a white line after failing to overtake a car quickly enough (bastards). The female cop looked just like Anthea Turner, made me feel like a class one criminal. As this was shortly after I'd passed the advanced motorcycle test, I felt even worse. Mind, it just goes to show that you don't need an advanced motorcycle to pass the advanced motorcycle test - much to the surprise of all those boring old blokes on BMW's.
Servicing was simple, oil every 1000 miles and the filter every two thou. Valves every 5000 miles and plugs at 3000 miles. All was well until about 35000 miles when what sounded like the camchain started to give trouble. Honda UK wanted 60-odd quid for a new camchain and to my horror the local rip-off merchant of a dealer told me that the cases would have to be split to replace it. F..k that!
Got a pattern chain from a neat little place I know complete with rivet plate for about twenty notes and got a very clever chap I know to just feed it in off the old one and joined it up. Bob's yer uncle, Fanny's yer aunt.
I could've done the job myself but I can be very clumsy. For example, I was changing the oil one day when I completely shagged the sump's thread and cracked the case! When I finished crying, it was straight into the yellow pages to find an aluminium welder, as a new sump's costly and also a huge job to undertake.
I found someone willing to do the job if I could take the engine to him. I felt close to suicide on finding the front engine bolt seized solid, the bloody thing would not shift for love nor money. No choice but to strip the bike down to the frame and shove it into the back of my brother's Metro.
With the job done it never gave any more trouble and the next few thousand miles were greatly enjoyed as everything was in fine fettle. The original exhaust long gone in favour of a Motad when it fell off - in fact, I haven't seen any of these bikes with their original exhaust, obviously short-lived from new. The one on mine was rotted to buggery, the design a bit slack insofar as it collects a lot of water.
Tyres last well, the back doing an easy ten thou and the front good for almost twice that. A heavy-duty chain and sprocket kit would see out nearly twelve thou. Speaking of which, the chain needed constant adjustment. Buying parts for this bike seems abnormally expensive, something to do with them now being pretty rare on the ground.
At 40,000 miles, the chain driven balancer system started to play up by making a loud rustling noise. After adjusting the chain, situated behind the clutch cover, it quietened down but needed regular attention - a new cover gasket required each time; much to my wallet's dismay.
Done holidays, rallies, commuting, etc - often two-up which doesn't spoil the performance. Survived three winters without much damage. Sold it for eight hundred quid with the only immediate problem a blown fork seal. Should've kept it, had nothing but hassle since despite buying a newer GPZ500S.
Chris Green