Despatches: Honda VT500

I notice that the glossies are writing about the joys of despatch riding in London - easy money, be your own boss, etc etc. Well the fact is, it's one of the shittiest boring jobs ever. On your own bike £50 a day might seem a lot of money but when you're going down Piccadilly in your sleep, and you've had a nose infection for two months from the filth funneled at you from taxis and bosses, £50 isn't enough £100 might do...

For four months last year I worked for a company who gave me a year old Honda VT500 with over 20000 miles on the clock. For £120 a week I was on call from 8.30am to 6.30pm (sometimes later if one was unlucky). Not allowed to use the bike out of company time and generally shoved around without regard for the health and safety at work act. Not that I wanted to ride the thing in the evening or weekend, 50 hours a week is no doddle. l was used to it when I quit, but it's still the worst job ever.

Unlike its rider the VT was extremely reliable, and only failed to ride off one morning because I'd hammered a nail in the back tyre the night before (strange habits these DRs - Ed). In the 12000 miles I used it, two rear and two front tyres were replaced, two sets of front brake pads and one battery. It had the oil changed every week. Nothing else was done - tappets, camchain, shaft drive, coolant, etc were all ignored.

A lot of guys riding the VTs really liked them. I thought mine stank - handled like an old K3 750 Honda I'd owned, terrible wobbles at anything over 75mph, a front wheel that never (at any speed) gave any indication of touching real tarmac and a top heaviness coupled with a small steering lock that had me toppling over in front of taxis on more than one occasion.

Power was adequate, nothing more. Some guys managed to blow them up, but rumour has it that they had to drain the oil out to do it. Petrol consumption never seemed to vary from the very high forties. Oil was burnt at a very rapid level that I would not have tolerated had it been mine, but I suspect this was due to its rather hard life. The brakes never felt like they were working, although they clearly did, wooden is perhaps a suitable simile.

The VT has to be a very sensible purchase for someone who just wants to ride and ride and doesn't care too much about the quality of the experience.

Despatch riders use them because they are reliable, they have shaft drive, don't drink petrol too fast and they don't look too ugly. Oh, nearly forgot, for some strange reason Honda stopped making the CX, which left the VT the only sensible bike to buy as a replacement.

If anyone living in or around London wants to buy one of these useful machines, i wouldn't ever consider buying an ex-despatch bike whatever the price - well not unless you can dump it on a dealer at a profit.

Robert Garnham